vs
Ladies and gentlemen, and fellow Mountaineers, this is going to be one hell of a pillow fight. Navy (3-2) vs. Pitt (2-3) is a veritable smorgasbord (spelled correctly Editor, I looked it up)of crappy football and underachieving players running bizarro offenses. We get to see the triple option run to mediocrity by the Midshipmen against Pitt's 9th ranked total defense. No, really, their D is ranked 9th. I know, I was fucking blown away too. We also get to see LeSean McCoy do virtually everything for Pitt. He's like the poor man's Darren McFadden (who, being from Arkansas, is already the poor man's McFadden, but myself being from West Virginia, I digress). McCoy plays QB, RB, and occasionally wideout, and honestly, he's pretty fucking good. Too bad he can't block, tackle, or coach.
There will be approxomately 30,000 yellow clad fans in Heinz Field to witness this fucking debacle, and by fans, I mean empty seats. I would like to pick the Panthers, as the Big East could be served well if those dipshits would get their once-powerful (read when they used to cheat their balls off) program out of the pooper and back to some level of respectability. Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on how much you loathe the modern day puttytats, Pitt has virtually no chance of pulling this off. Why you ask, can they likely not beat a lame ass military academy squad? Well, friend, because THIS is their coach. Jesus, I'm so glad he's at Pitt. I would only be more satisfied if he were coaching those bastards the Hokies. Or Ohio State. Yeah, the Browneyes with Wannstedt, that would be great. Or it wouldn't matter at all, because the rest of the Big Ten lies down when they play the Browneyes anyway. I mean, Purdue throws the ball all over the yard in normal play, then run up the gut every play against tOSU. It's almost like they're being paid to let tOSU win. Considering the Browneyes' past, maybe we're on to something there. Enough rambling.
Navy, on the other hand, got absolutely blown the fuck out by a potentially very crappy Rutgers side, making it impossible to pick them either. I mean, they really, really suck. To make matters worse, they then cried about being taunted by a bunch of filthy guidos who have nothing to live for outside of trash covered beaches, greasy acne-splotched women with bad accents, and canolis, until they were given a formal apology. For the love of all that is holy, if they can't handle verbal abuse from illiterate Jersey trash, how can they defend our freedom anyway? Those skirts wouldn't even survive one night at Envy or Bent Willey's, those places are like Brunswick South. But that's beside the point, which I'm finally getting to.
The point is as follows. This "football game" is a matchup of absolutely atrocious squads running goofy offenses with emotionally over-sensitive "players". Will I watch it? Abso-fucking-lutely. Will I enjoy it? Abso-fucking-lutely. Will it be a good game? Highly, highly doubtful.
Regardless, I'm going with my heart on this one (I always root for Big East teams out of conference, regardless of how much I would normally despise them) and taking Pitt. Pitt 27, Navy 23 (Navy gets 3 tuds(thanks Shannon Sharpe) and a safety when Pat Bostick has a nervous breakdown, pisses his pants, and lies in the fetal position in the end zone after seeing his GF with another dude in the stands).
For a real analysis of this game, head over to a fine website run by some dudes whose email address I can't find. It really is a good website, and I really can't find their email address. This being new to blogging thing kind of sucks once in a while.
On that note, peace out. I'll keep all of you riveted readers updated during the game, and will be adding a brand new Daily Devastation tomorrow after work. Devastation is delightful.
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